Is Someone Else's Attitude Stealing Your Joy?

When someone is nasty to you, what do you do? Do you mull over what they said, wishing you had thought of that great come-back? Or at least had the courage to put them in their place?
What about when someone around you is depressed, does that mellow your joy?
Does someone else's bad, gloomy day, make you bad and gloomy?

As women, we are made to respond. Our husband leads, we respond. That’s how we are made.

But what happens when what we are given is a bad attitude?

In a household of eight boys, I am surrounded with testosterone. Men are made to be warriors, to confront, to challenge. That means sometimes the battle is thick and the attitude is great.

Women want to nurture, to fix broken things, to make people happy.
That’s not always possible.
With some of my sons when they are crabby, I could do nothing to make them happy. That’s their choice. But I found, because they were crabby, I had to work even harder not to be crabby with them or at them.
When it’s the husband, it’s even harder. (That's not to say that he gets crabby, mind you.)
How do you choose to be happy when those around you have chosen to be crabby?

Notice my choice of words: “chose.” You don’t have to be in the depths of despond, just because everyone (or just someone) has chosen that for themselves.
It is a choice.
Realize you cannot change someone else.

You cannot make someone else do what they should.
You cannot make them happy.
If their crabbiness is making you crabby, look where your focus is…

Yes, I understand you want to help them. But you can’t.

“These things have I written unto you that your joy may be full.” Paul doesn’t add, if everyone else is happy…it just says that your joy may be full.
Even in this imperfect world, with unhappy people around you.

Where’s your focus?

“Fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.” Hebrews 12:2

Jesus didn’t have great things to look forward to. He had the cross. But He looked beyond the cross, looked beyond what this world offered.
He looked for the eternal hope.
Jesus remains constant even in the ups and downs of this world’s lack of joy.
“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.” Hebrews 13:8
He wants our joy to be complete in Him.
“These things we write, so that our joy may be made complete.” I John 1:4

What if your children aren’t walking in truth? Is that cause to lose the joy given by God?
“I have no greater joy than this, to hear of my children walking in the truth.” 3 John 1:4
Did Jesus know that some would reject Him? He still had joy.
That doesn’t mean that you turn off your concern for your wayward child. But sometimes thinking about them all the time kills your joy.
Commit your loved ones to God. Give Him the burden of their waywardness.
It is a moment by moment existence, isn’t it?
I fall into despair so easily.
We are to grieve with those who grieve. But not be crabby and depressed, because of their choices.
Nor are we to live like we have no hope. just because someone else is.
Stop, check your focus, and re-align to God’s view of this world and the hope that He has given.
He gives hope.
In His hope, joy is found.
His joy is constant.
Reflect Him.

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I write about what matters...to you---
women, wives and moms---
about your family, faith and future.
I write about what's hard, what helps and what heals.
I show you how it's done. And not done.
I hold your hand as you find what matters to the Savior.
And let go of those things that mattered to you, but not to Him.
I write about what matters...to Him.
               Sonya Contreras

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Tell of My Kingdom's Glory
Three Book Series

Faith
Find more articles about faith here:
Reminders of What's Important
God's Unmeasurable Love
A Quarter of a Century Spent for Our Country
What Were You Thinking?
Who Are You Watching?
Boundaries for a Better Life
God's Boundaries
Memories of a Hero Mom
The Ripple Effect
How Do We Think Like Jesus
Litany of a Waiting Woman
Ever Cook a Frog?
New Year's Reminders
They Galled Her Gammy
When God Speaks
A Russian Christmas Story
Be Thankful
Be Grateful
Are You Tired of the Same, Old Thing?
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Laughter—Why Laugh?
Mom
Are You Disturbed?
Unity of the Brothers
Encouragements To Declutter
Do You Have Too Much Stuff?
Too Much Stress
Getting Past the Noise—The Value of Silence
Are You Scatterbrained?
How Good Are You?
Looking for Something Good To Read?
A Cup of Cold Water
I Will Trust When I Cannot See
Encouragement—What Is It?
Being in God's Presence
"Einstein and the Professor"
When God Is Silent
Do You Crave Beauty?
Using Stories to Discipline
The Danger of the Wrong Story
Using Stories to Teach Lessons
God is in charge of the future
November Dare Joy Challenge
Ungratefulness
Developing an Attitude of Gratitude
Looking for Jesus
What Do Your Prayers Reflect?
Life's Little Pleasures
Daniel—Greatly Loved by God
Take Every Thought
Jars of Clay
What Do Your Words Reveal about Your Heart?
How Do You Get Strong Faith?
Too Busy for God's Word?
How Do You Think Like Jesus?
Reflections from a Mom
Pain—What's It Good For?
Why Marry?
Consider the Robin
One Life Who Made a Difference
What Day Are You Living In?
Interrupted by God
Is Jesus Really the Answer to Everything?
Are You Beat Up?
What's Your Hurry?
Are You a Manipulator?
Are You Salty?
Are You Condemned?
Trying to Understand?
Do You Expect Answers to Your Prayers?
Do You Eat Your Stress?
Need Focus?
Going through Trouble?
Immanuel—God with Us
Looking for a Relationship?
When God Says, "No!"
What Do You Do with Left-Overs?
How Great Is Your God?
Are You Needy?
How Do You See Sin?
What Do Your Words Mean?
Is Evil Overwhelming You?
Those Aha Moments
Is Your Soul Happy?
Are You Ignored?
Looking for the God Moment
Do You Know Truth from Almost Truth?
I Believe in Jesus—What Now?
Do You Have Your "Son"-Glasses On?
Less Is More
Singing His Praise
Are You Trying To Do It All?
What Do You Do with All These Prayer Requests?
Have a Problem?
Do You Know How to Pray?
Looking for God in Every Moment
Are You Receptive to God's Blessings?
Tell the Senate: Mothers Aren't Birthing People
Is Your Life Complicated?
How Do We Fight Evil?
Fearfully and Wonderfully Made
Giving Up or Taking Away
the Bible is simple
Are You a Dripping Faucet?
What's Your Testimony?
The Final Move
Be Careful What You Wish For!
Are Your Prayers Answered?
I Choose Joy
What Have You Learned from Your Hardship?
Who Are You Trying to Change?
What's Your Five-Year Plan?
The Danger of "Aloneness"
My Colors
Are You a Whiner?
Are Your Works Approved?
Do You Think You're Stressed?
Is Your Soul Feeling Ragged?
God Speaks to the Heart of the King
What about the Details?
Have You Felt the Long-Suffering of God?
How Does God Lead You?
Do You Have Enough?
Don't Carry More than You Need
Cast the Seed
God Is Faithful
Are You Deceived?
Are You Essential?
Are You Safe?
Are You Tired of the Same Old Thing?
Does the World Make Sense?
Have You Seen God's Majesty?
Do You Feel Judged?
If You Only Had One More Day To Live
Are You Understood?
Do You Long for the Word of God?
Slow Down and Smell the Dead Leaves
Are You Hospitable?
Our Heritage Is Bought by Blood
Are You Disturbed?
Are You Depressed?
I Did It My Way
Finding the Simple Life with Meaning
The Simple Life
Do You Have the Right Words?
Did Your Dream Die?
On the Other Side of the Fence
Marijuana, Mental Illness, and Violence
Confessions of a Desperate Mom
Saving for Tomorrow
A Wedding Remembered
Who Will Stand in the Gap?
Are You a Protector or a Ruler?
Who Are You?
Are You an Image Bearer or a Wad of Cells?
Are You a Watchman?
Where Do You Find Meaning?
The Lamb of God as Told by a Scribe
What Love Is This?
Remember: The Symbols of Passover Explained
Tea and Rest
Do You Have Peace?
What Makes a Marriage Work?
When Life Is Awful
Are You Strong Enough?
Rules
Seasons
Be Faithful through Suffering
Do You Know the Word?
Wake Up! Strengthen What Remains
Are You Spit in God's Mouth?
Is Jezebel in Your Midst?
Do You Stand Against Satan Himself?
Are You Tired of Being a Mom?
What in the World Is Happening?
It's Not My Story
How Would Your Faith Compare?
Are You Sinking?
Are You a Rule Follower?
Useful for Him
An Intimate Moment with Mary
The Worldview that Makes the
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Thoughts to Ponder
What Does It Take To Know the
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See the Story in the Stars
Do the Scriptures Burn You?
Being in His Presence
Contentment: It's Not for the Timid
How Secure Are You?
How Do You Respond To Stupid People?
The Earthworm Is My Hero
Heart Issues or Issues of the Heart
Things Aren't Always What They Seem
More faith articles are found here:

under the Table of Contents. Also available in book form.
Or here:

under the Table of Contents. Also available in book form.
Articles on Suffering can be found  here, 

under Table of Contents. Also available in book form.
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Aug 12, 2017 The Heavens Declare the Glory of God
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