Interrupted by God

Joey had a friend who was getting married.
His fiancee had planned his life. He would do this. He would make this much. They would have this many children. They would live here. She had planned out their life.
Joey’s friend wisely broke off the engagement.

Abraham Lincoln’s wife planned to make her husband the president. She had chosen Abraham over another. She pushed him to be president. But made his life miserable.

How much do you control?

Recently on our family viber, we were making plans for our next family get-together—a wedding in June. We’re in charge of one thing—the rehearsal dinner.
Our newest member to viber (and bride in the wedding), said, “Wow! I better get organized. Your family organizes everything!”
Perhaps it depends on who you ask.
My husband has Mexican blood. Men'ana (tomorrow) works for him. 
When we plan trips, he packs the day we leave, whereas I’ve packed and repacked for two weeks.

Is your kitchen so organized your husband can’t put away the dishes for fear it will be wrong?
Is your floors so sacred no dirty shoes will walk on it, even your husband—who pays the mortgage?

We, ladies, like control.
We dictate how we have our houses.
Since we clean (My son does mine. He’s also become a little dictator telling other brothers to take off their muddy boots), we feel we have the right to tell our husbands what he can do.
When my husband works outside, he must walk through the house. He should feel free to walk through with muddy boots. 
It’s HIS house.

He would remind me it’s “OURS.”
That’s one of those gender differences they forget to tell you about….
Women think, “It’s my money.”
Men think, “It’s ours.” Even though he earns it.
She thinks, “It’s my house.”
He thinks, “It’s ours.”

We must, as wives, consciously remind ourselves, “He is the king of this house.” Not relegate him to the man cave in the garage or basement.
That idea permeates our feministic culture.
We must help our men gain back their castle as their domain.
That means, we must give up our control of clean floors because they want to walk on it with dirty boots.
That is giving up control.
That is allowing for interruptions.

How often do people limit how many children they have because children interrupt their career?
Or when they have children, they won’t be interrupted by their child’s question when they are busy on their phones?

Just an interruption here:
Children are extremely good at asking for things while we’re on the phone. 
My rule has been, “if you ask while I’m on the phone, the answer is ‘No.’”
One son became good at phrasing the question, “Do you mind if I….”
I answer, "Wait until I'm off the phone," but because he has interrupted, I don't feel inclined to give consent.

Anyway, interruptions.
Children aren’t interruptions.
They are the reason you stay at home.
They are the reason you have a home.

We all have degrees of control.
I’ve had a few boys who prefer to “wing things.” 
When three of the boys were assigned to build a chicken coop, one wanted to go to Lowes for supplies. The others quickly reminded him they needed to plan first. He thought they could think of everything while they walked through Lowes.

When interruptions hinder our plans, how do we respond?
Are we angry? Upset? 

How many things have gone EXACTLY as you planned?
We go through life trying to plan EVERYTHING.
I’ve been planning for Josh’s graduation celebration. 
I must accommodate wind, rain, cold and heat. 
How do you even have a picnic in Oklahoma?

Planning is important. I must plan enough food for 45 people. But some are children who won’t eat much. 
Yet I don’t want to have too little. 
But I don’t want left-overs.
I can stress over every item.
Do I have enough plates? What about...

If I stress over every item, I won’t enjoy the process or the celebration.

That is how most of us live our lives.
Stressing over the details that never happen.
My thoughts are so consumed with planning, I’ve forgotten my focus should be thanking God for the son who reached graduation.

Know what I’m s-l-o-w-l-y realizing?
By allowing God to work out my plans, those interruptions aren’t interruptions—because God planned them for me.
Those interruptions make me look to God for answers.
They are sent by God to direct our thoughts to Him in ways we didn’t before.
They remind us we aren’t in control of this moment or the next.
It’s that moment by moment living with God we’ve been talking about.

Know what happens when I give those interruptions to God? 
He enables me to complete all my tasks.
In less time.
With less energy.
Sometimes I find I didn’t really need to do those things.
And I have more time to thank and praise Him.

Displaying 1 comment

I can see I'm a bit behind on reading this article, but I am catching up, it's just rather here and there. Really like the article, a great reminder. You know, I sure wish you had been writing these articles when I was raising my kids, they would have been a big help. But I can still pass on your advise so the grandchildren benefit.
I especially liked these words:
"Children aren’t interruptions.
They are the reason you stay at home.
They are the reason you have a home."
I know I too often was so busy at my tasks that the children were an interruption. What's the saying, "Too soon old, too late smart?"
Thanks again, Sonya, love your blog, Anne

I write about what you---
women, wives and moms---
about your family, faith and future.
I write about what's hard, what helps and what heals.
I show you how it's done. And not done.
I hold your hand as you find what matters to the Savior.
And let go of those things that mattered to you, but not to Him.
I write about what Him.
               Sonya Contreras

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Author of Biblical fiction, married to my best friend, and challenged by eight sons’ growing pains as I write about what matters.

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